How to stop being petty. petty man

Pettiness as a quality of a person is a tendency to attach exaggerated importance to the insignificant to the detriment of the essential, to pay increased attention to trifles, to take into account every penny, every little thing.

One day Mary Magdalene came and poured a very valuable perfume on Jesus' feet. Judas was there and said: - You should have warned her! This is waste! This oil is so valuable... you can't just buy it. People are starving and these incense are so expensive. Why waste them? - There will always be poor people, when I'm gone, I can take care of them. You don't understand this woman's heart. Don't bother her pouring incense, expensive, inexpensive - it doesn't matter. I see a great feeling growing in her heart. It's a prayer... I can't interfere with her prayer.

Pettiness is the shooting of the soul by a small-caliber mind. A petty mind does not pursue great goals. Moreover, it directly prevents the soul from turning around. Like Cerberus, the mind, together with its friend, the false ego, filters all information coming from the soul. The soul, for example, wants to show appreciation and gratitude for excellent service, but the greedy mind does not want to listen to it, scrupulously checks the account and pays kopeck for kopeck. In relations with his wife, the main thing for a petty mind is not love and respect for each other, but the correctness and accountability of her spending. It is worth the unfortunate wife to make an irrational, in his opinion, purchase, and a hail of exaggerated accusations of extravagance will fall upon her.

Pettiness tends to make an elephant out of a fly. Armed with false principles, she will foam at the mouth to prove her case. It is useless for her to say that if you put principles on one side of the scale, and kindness on the other, the advantage should definitely be on the side of kindness. Kindness is above any principles.

Pettiness is a damper for the important and a blower for the trifling. There is such an Odessa anecdote. The doorbell rings, a young man opens it. They ask him: - Did you heroically save my son on the beach yesterday? Yes it's me! Where is the cap? … Losing the main thing for trifles, pettiness is ready to turn any trifle into a global problem, wasting time and wasting strength to solve really important life tasks. A greedy, base egoist will be boring, annoyingly ringing about insignificant details, completely forgetting about the main thing. As they say, big money loves silence, only small things tear up pockets, ring like noise in the ear and rattle like an empty barrel on asphalt. Pettiness in collaboration with pedantry, meticulousness and scrupulousness is a hell of a cocktail for yourself and others.

Once the editor instructed the journalist to urgently write an article and hand it over early in the morning to the room. At the same time, he warned that he was tired of unfulfillment and low article "productivity". There will be no article by the morning, consider yourself unemployed. The journalist “inspired” by such parting words enthusiastically set to work. After writing the title of the article, he drew attention to the dust under the table on which the computer stood. It never occurred to him to clean it himself, and his wife was at work. No matter how much he tried to “give birth” to at least a line, the petty mind constantly got lost in the thought of dust. Having suffered until the evening in fruitless journalistic torments, he sighed with a sense of relief when his wife appeared. Without forewords in raised tones, he immediately put forward his, as he considered, fair claims. But the main thing is not what you say, but how. Selfishness for a hundred miles rushing, no matter how you hide. He instantly summons the opposing force, the other ego, into action. An altercation begins, smoothly turning into a scandal. He is angry, she is angry. A gloomy, leaden cloud of malice hangs in the apartment. Work is forgotten. Yes, and what kind of work in a hurricane of negative emotions? A gloomy morning grins like a snow-white sheet of paper with a lonelyly hidden title. The editor sarcastically says: “For some reason, this is how I saw our last date today. Well? There was love without joy, separation will be without sorrow. So pettiness trips up the main thing in your life.

Not seeing the forest for the trees, pettiness recklessly rushes to the solution of more and more petty questions, constantly thrown up by life. Realizing in hindsight that real life is passing by, pettiness becomes dissatisfied and falls into a gloomy state of mind. Gloominess is the hallmark of pettiness. A person constantly shows discontent, turning into a whiner, a bore, a grumbler and a grumbler. With a complete lack of harmony with himself and with the outside world, he aggressively makes claims to the world.

Pettiness causes neglect and disgust. A good lesson for petty claims was received by Apple from Samsung. A California federal court upheld some of Apple's claims against Samsung and ordered them to pay the latter $1.05 billion. Samsung complied with the court order. Right down to the last cent. More than thirty trucks filled to the brim with nickels. delivered compensation to the headquarters of Apple, exposing it to the ridicule of the whole world.

Pettiness is the theft of love, kindness, affection, friendship and dreams from life. Anastasia Zagodina has wonderful lines that expose pettiness:

What are we spending our lives on? For petty quarrels
To stupid words, empty talk,
To the vanity of insults, to anger again and again.
What are we doing with our lives...
And it would be necessary to Love.

We burn life to the ground, everything into an empty something -
For boring things, unnecessary worries ...
For the sake of society, we invent masks ...
What are we spending our lives on?
And it should be petting.

We spray life into gloomy boredom,
On "image" and "prestige", unnecessary science,
For lies and boasting, for gratuitous service.
What are we spending our lives on?
And it would be necessary to friendship.

We're in a hurry to get somewhere, we're getting something.
We are looking for something, but we lose more;
We're hoarding gold, rags and silver...
What are we spending our lives on?
And it would be necessary to good.

We worry, we shout, we suffer over trifles;
We choose funny little things with seriousness.
But no matter how much you guess, you will choose the wrong one.
What are we doing with our lives...
And it would be necessary to dream.

Petr Kovalev 2013

See picky... Dictionary of Russian synonyms and expressions similar in meaning. under. ed. N. Abramova, M .: Russian dictionaries, 1999. petty small, picky, insignificant, frivolous; sucked out of your finger, not worth a damn, idle, ... ... Synonym dictionary

SMALL, oh, oh; chen, chna. 1. Giving importance to trifles, trifles. M. character. Petty nature. 2. Trifling, insignificant, petty (in 6 values). Petty quibbles. M. fact. Petty quarrels. petty interests. | noun pettiness, and, wives. Explanatory ... ... Explanatory dictionary of Ozhegov

petty- petty and petty. In the meaning "pertaining to trade in small goods" petty. Petty trade. Small shop. In the meaning “trifle, insignificant; attaching exaggerated importance to trifles, trifles ”petty. Petty person. petty interests... Dictionary of pronunciation and stress difficulties in modern Russian

I adj. 1. Based on trifles, on insignificant, petty, insignificant facts. 2. Not having significant value, not worthy of attention. II adj. Giving importance to trifles, small, unimportant facts, circumstances. Explanatory ... ... Modern explanatory dictionary of the Russian language Efremova

Petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty, petty,… … Word forms

petty- m Christmas tree; briefly form chen, chna (about a person) ... Russian spelling dictionary

petty- kr.f. me/lochen, me/lochna, chno, chny; smaller/finer (based on small things). Mek/lochny man. Furniture interests… Spelling Dictionary of the Russian Language

petty- A/A pr; 110 claim see Appendix II (giving exaggerated importance to small things; based on small things) small / small small / small small / finer 260 see Appendix II ... Dictionary of Russian accents

petty- Syn: see minor, see frivolous... Thesaurus of Russian business vocabulary

Aya, oh; chen, chna, chna. 1. Based on trifles, on insignificant, petty, insignificant facts. My interests. My nitpicking. My grievances. // Not significant; small. My details. My problems. My information. 2. Giving ... ... encyclopedic Dictionary

Books

Orgon box, Zinik Zinoviy. The new novel by Zinoviy Zinik is a story of personal betrayal, told by the hero of the new time in the language of social networks. Envious, jealous and petty, he talks about the complexities of his own soul, ...
Orgon Box, Zinnik Z.. The new novel by Zinoviy Zinik is a story of personal betrayal, told by the hero of the new time in the language of social networks. Envious, jealous and petty, he talks about the complexities of his own soul, ...

Perhaps the worst collation of a person is pettiness. Who among us does not like to deal with people who are characterized by generosity of soul, grand gestures and beautiful deeds? From a picky person, you are unlikely to wait for them.

In our view, a picky person is a stingy person, one that is stingy not only with gifts, but also with feelings. Also, a person is called picky, one that constantly finds fault with others. But let's look at what is actually put into the representation of "pettiness".

What does a picky person mean

Pettiness is the tendency of a person to attach weight to the insignificant, to pay increased attention to trifles, as a result of which the significant goes unnoticed.

A petty person is one who does not notice significant prophetic things, giving much attention to details. His life is filled with turmoil, petty troubles, anxiety over trifles.

The details so fill the mind of a picky person that the truthful arrangement of the prophetic does not add up in his head. Excessive nitpicking
virility prevents such a figure from rising above the turmoil, feeling the taste of life and achieving sensations in it.

Pettiness, like any extreme, can lead to different life tasks. A picky person can scrupulously keep order in the house, not noticing the psychological tasks of his family members. For him, a correctly done homework of a child is an order of magnitude higher than children's strife with classmates. Everyday little things take away time from a meticulous person and deprive him of psychological susceptibility.

Petty people are characterized by excessive susceptibility, they are often sensitive and vindictive. All this may appear due to the fact that someone turned away from them at a difficult moment, showed inattention, offended an angry joke, or left them without praise at the right time. But in fact, the cause of the origin of pettiness in temper must be sought much deeper ...

Why does a person become picky?

According to psychologists, there are two reasons why a person can become picky and meticulous:

the presence of a vile disposition, one that originates in early childhood;
circumstances of life that turned a typical person into a meticulous tyrant.

Consider the 1st path to the origin of pettiness. As you know, it is in childhood (up to five years) that the foundation of the figure is laid. Due to improper upbringing, a child in adulthood can blame his parents for all his failures, finding fault with them over trifles. As for the second way, everyone can fall into the risk group of becoming a picky person. This is due to the fact that life circumstances can spoil the temper of any of us. How often it is allowed to track the transformation of a cheerful, clear person into a gloomy, pernicious object, one that is constantly dissatisfied with something.

It should be noted that it is impossible to say with exact certainty what became the true reason for the origin of pettiness in temper: either the child had a predisposition to pickiness, or life made such a person.

Small people: how to recognize them?

Which of us girls does not dream of a prince on a white horse?

What is our disappointment when, instead of a decent prince, a meticulous man is nearby! If, at the beginning of your acquaintance, your chosen one chooses a cheaper bouquet at a flower kiosk, and shudders at a restaurant when ordering a full-fledged lunch instead of a cup of coffee, most likely, you are faced with a picky man.

Endure it all your life or end the relationship, you decide. But before you make your choice, we offer you to get acquainted with the obvious signs of a picky man.

Here are some of them:

your chosen one does not visit paid hospitals, considering it a waste of money (at the same time, he can be a wealthy person);
gets annoyed when you beg him for money for any women's things (cosmetics, handbags, jewelry, etc.);
touchy and vindictive;
gives preference to public transport;
demanding towards you;
likes to lecture on the topic “How to live”;
constantly reminds of the return of the money that he lent you (traditionally, we are talking about a small amount);
does not make grand gestures (filling the bathtub with champagne or strewn your bed with flowers is not for him).

It is worth noting that the pettiness of a man lies not only in counting the whole penny and unwillingness to do romantic deeds. Due to the increased attention to detail, a picky person does not notice the significant and serious. A scrupulously ironed shirt is much more significant for him than the reason for your bad mood.

In addition, a meticulous person is hefty irritable and unbalanced. It is easy for others to piss him off. Picky men, at any convenient occasion, will remind friends and relatives that they live absolutely abnormally.

Often such tediousness leads to a reluctance to communicate with an overly economical person, both physically and sensitively.

If we talk about women, then pettiness in them, no matter how unusual, occurs as often as in men. Finally, the attorneys of the powerful sex are not brought into a furore by this unpleasant trait of character. Captious ladies are prone to greed and selfishness, they will not miss the opportunity to inflate a brawl over a trifle.

And men also look for tea in their chosen ones for such qualities as the beauty of the soul, patience and awareness.

How to overcome pettiness in character

Do not underestimate such a quality of the figure as pettiness. It can lead to a break in relations, cause misunderstanding and mutual resentment between people.

To prevent this from happening, it is significant to help a picky person get rid of internal bile in a timely manner by the following methods:

straight Talk;
Attentive attitude.

Sincere communication between people is available to everyone. If people could talk openly with each other, then many tasks could be avoided. If one of the family members shows pettiness, it is worth pointing out this to him and trying to find a solution to the problem together. If we are talking about a serious internal contention of the figure, in addition to family support, the support of a psychologist will be required.

And remember: the effectiveness of methods for eliminating pettiness in temper will directly depend on what the picky person prefers for himself: groundless indignation with the world around him or love for life.

“The soul of the poet could not bear the shame of petty insults” M.Yu. Lermontov

This phrase is familiar to many, but how pettiness manifests itself in people's lives, let's try to figure it out in this article.

A petty person does not notice important things in everyday life and in relationships with loved ones, as his attention is focused on details.

Even gifts, sympathy, and courtesies are manageable and given out on schedule. For example, flowers - only on March 8, showing care only on weekends (at best). And always such people broadcast incredible stinginess in the manifestation of any feelings.

But at the same time, a petty person can carefully control the order in his house so that the tube of toothpaste is closed and the brush is turned with its villi to the north.

He, counting every penny, does not see your emotional experiences at all and is often in a state of discontent for any reason.

For example, homework done by a child is more important for a petty person than the presence of serious complexes in a schoolchild that he cannot cope with on his own. It can rather be defined as .

When rendering a service, making a gift, such a petty person will hint that you did not thank him properly, and will not miss the opportunity to remind you of this.

And if you showed inattention, ingratitude, he will remember this for many years.

Female pettiness is a quality that men do not really like, because they are distinguished by greed and selfishness, find fault with any trifles. But men are looking for completely different qualities in every woman: patience, understanding, the beauty of the soul.

We all dream of the generosity of the soul, beautiful deeds and grand gestures. But from a petty person you are unlikely to wait for them. This can be seen more as a manifestation of disrespect towards a partner.

Even the most wonderful relationships, pettiness can turn into a burdensome burden that you want to throw off yourself.

Pettiness is manifested on such sins of a person , like GREED, . And a permanent state that can even develop into vindictiveness.

Most often, a petty person was once very offended, and now this karma is manifesting, and now he is trying to somehow protect himself, subjecting everything that happens around to the strictest control. Such people are rarely visited by inspiration, and they cannot listen to the impulses of the soul and deny themselves everything sublime and beautiful.

How to get rid of a negative character trait - pettiness?

First, consciously admit and try to explain to yourself or another person that there is such an obsession with trifles, and such behavior is unpleasant and uncomfortable for you.

Secondly, it is useful for such people to relax, as well as to do something unusual: dream as much as possible, look into the eyes of your loved ones more often, listen to your feelings, soul.

Thirdly: to learn to accept everything with gratitude and, of course, to be cleansed of sins.

And then pettiness can be transformed into caring and frugality - positive qualities that can strengthen any family and help you become happy and with a generous soul.

Ratanova Lyubov Vladimirovna

Perhaps the worst characteristic of a person is pettiness. Who among us does not like to deal with people who are characterized by generosity of soul, grand gestures and beautiful deeds? From a petty person, you are unlikely to wait for them.

In our view, a petty person is a stingy person who is stingy not only with gifts, but also with feelings. Also called petty is a person who constantly finds fault with others. But let's figure out what is actually invested in the concept of "pettiness".

What does petty person mean?

Pettiness is the tendency of a person to attach great importance to the insignificant, to pay increased attention to trifles, as a result of which the essential remains unnoticed.

A petty person is one who does not notice important things, giving a lot of attention to details. His life is filled with vanity, petty chores, anxiety over trifles.

Details so fill the mind of a petty person that the true state of things does not add up in his head. Excessive nitpicking
humility prevents such a person from rising above the hustle and bustle, to feel the taste of life and achieve success in it.

Pettiness, like any extreme, can lead to various life problems. A petty person can carefully keep order in the house, not noticing the psychological problems of his family members. For him, a correctly done homework of a child is an order of magnitude higher than children's conflicts with classmates. Everyday little things take away time from a picky person and deprive him of psychological sensitivity.

Petty people are overly sensitive, often touchy and vindictive. All this may arise due to the fact that someone turned away from them in difficult times, showed inattention, insulted with a cruel joke, or left them without praise at the right time. But in fact, the reason for the appearance of pettiness in the character must be looked for much deeper ...

Why does a person become petty?

According to psychologists, there are two reasons why a person can become petty and picky:

the presence of a bad character, which originates in early childhood;
circumstances of life that turned a normal person into a picky tyrant.

Consider the first path to pettiness. As you know, it is in childhood (up to five years) that the foundation of personality is laid. Due to improper upbringing, a child in adulthood can blame his parents for all his failures, finding fault with them over trifles. As for the second path, everyone can fall into the risk group of becoming a petty person. This is due to the fact that life circumstances can spoil the character of any of us. How often one can observe the transformation of a cheerful, sunny person into a gloomy, harmful object that is constantly dissatisfied with something.

It should be noted that it is impossible to say with exact certainty what became the true reason for the appearance of pettiness in character: either the child had a predisposition to pickiness, or life made such a person.

Small people: how to recognize them?

Which of us girls does not dream of a prince on a white horse?

What is our disappointment when, instead of a noble prince, there is a picky man nearby! If at the beginning of your acquaintance, your chosen one chooses a cheaper bouquet at a flower kiosk, and shudders at a restaurant when ordering a full meal instead of a cup of coffee, most likely you are faced with a petty man.

Endure it all your life or end the relationship, you decide. But before you make your choice, we offer you to get acquainted with the obvious signs of a petty man.

Here are some of them:

your chosen one does not visit paid clinics, considering it a waste of money (at the same time, he can be a wealthy person);
gets annoyed when you ask him for money for some women's things (cosmetics, handbags, jewelry, etc.);
touchy and vindictive;
gives preference to public transport;
demanding towards you;
loves to lecture "How to Live";
constantly reminds you of the return of the money that he lent you (usually a small amount);
does not make grand gestures (filling the bathtub with champagne or strewn your bed with flowers is not for him).

It is worth noting that the pettiness of a man lies not only in counting every penny and unwillingness to do romantic deeds. Due to the increased attention to trifles, a petty person does not notice the important and serious. A carefully ironed shirt is much more important to him than the reason for your bad mood.

In addition, a picky person is very irritable and quick-tempered. It is easy for others to piss him off. Petty men, at any opportunity, will remind friends and loved ones that they live completely wrong.

Often such tediousness leads to an unwillingness to communicate with a person who is too economical, both materially and emotionally.

If we talk about women, then pettiness in them, oddly enough, occurs as often as in men. Of course, the representatives of the stronger sex are not delighted with this unpleasant character trait. Petty ladies are prone to greed and selfishness, they will not miss the opportunity to stir up a scandal over a trifle.

But men also look for such qualities as the beauty of the soul, patience and understanding in their chosen ones.

How to overcome pettiness in character

Do not underestimate such a personality trait as pettiness. It can lead to a break in relations, cause misunderstanding and mutual resentment between people.